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Friday, July 25, 2008

Matt Stafford: The Last True Gentleman

In what was, by far, the highlight of Media Days, Kentucky wide receiver Dicky Lyons Jr. held court for the press with a monologue that would have made Johnny Carson jealous. Among the many great one-liners, however, was a story about a dream he had about Georgia quarterback Matthew Stafford.

Lyons, a senior at UK, recently got engaged. Since then, he said, he's been having regular dreams that his fiancee is leaving him.

"Cosmo says it's natural to have these dreams," Lyons said.

After attending a camp hosted by Peyton and Eli Manning and attended by dozens of top college players, including Stafford, Lyons had another of these dreams. In it, Lyons follows his fiancee to a local bar because, he said, he was suspicious of her. When they reach the bar, he approaches her and asks what she's doing. She responds that she doesn't want to marry him.

Frustrated, Lyons shakes her and yells at her to focus. Then, he makes the mistake of slapping her in an attempt to bring her back to reality. That's when our hero, Matthew Stafford, intervenes.

"I turn around," Lyons said, "and Matt Stafford punches me in the nose."

Stafford then yells at Lyons that, "You don t hit women!"

Like all great dreams, a bit of craziness ensued from there. Former Georgia quarterback Blake Barnes -- who can t even get past Stafford on the depth chart in Lyons dreams! -- steps in and starts hitting Lyons, too.

"I'm fighting all these quarterbacks," Lyons said, "and I did pretty well because I was fighting them, twisting their arms, and I knew a bunch of Army Ranger chokes in my dream. It was just crazy."

When he woke up, Lyons was still laughing about the dream. So he grabbed his cell phone and dashed off a quick text message to Stafford. "I'm dreaming about you," it said.

So did Stafford reply?

"No, no response," Lyons said. "I don't know if he liked me that much."

1 comment:

Jon said...

Dicky Lyons is a legend, I just hope he catches a few balls this year!